I'm baaaaaack....

Happy Sunday to everyone and it's so freaking fantastic to be back! I let this blog go because one of my sidebars slipped to the other side so basically I had one looooong left sidebar and no right sidebar and I couldn't figure out for the life of me what I did or how to fix it. Had I thought for a minute, I could have emailed Zoe at Chick & Sassy a long time ago to save the day as she's the one who fixed me up here, but nooo I had to wait years down the road before duh it hit me, email Zoe!

Zoe fixed me right up, God love her!

Okay let me tell you why I wanted to resurrect this blog. I just went into the hospital (I'm fine!) for an ultrasound and they put a "scope" down my throat to find out why I'm having so much stomach trouble and they found out it's my gall bladder which I've got to have removed (really I'm fine with it...I just want to be out of pain!). Seriously it's fine because now I know and it's not the C word which of course I had that in the back of my mind. Before the tests, all sorts of things were rolling through my head as it would do when you're about to come face to face with your maker or so it seems at the time. Such a drama queen.
But that's not the main reason. The main reason was I was talking to an author about how I started this blog and when I had a book out, it really helped to sell it as I made lots of friends and when those friends found out about my new book, they bought it!

Here's the thing. I went over to this blog to see if the book was still in the sidebar which it isn't (must have taken it down for some odd reason) but one thing led to another and I landed on my links section to see just who was still blogging. What an eye-opener. One had died and several had stopped blogging.
While Zoe and I were hashing out the details of getting this up and running again, I started revamping my blog links so that only my favorites (some had died as I had mentioned but I still wanted to keep the links) remained.
Here's the sad thing about walking down that memory lane. It reminds you of how much time changes things. One blogger left one last message: I'm still here, but I need to know if anyone is reading this? There were no comments and that was the last she wrote.

So sad.

Of course one of my last messages was that I had moved to another blog, so I guess when people landed on this blog they thought I had disappeared too. The crazy thing is this blog is still getting great hits - from the search engines.

But the search engines is so impersonal. Why they are landing here is anyone's guess (not knocking it!) but where is the community I once knew and loved? Where are the laughs, the joys, the friends I would visit every day to see what they were up to?

Back to the tests I had a few days ago, when you are at the boomer age and things start going up on you, you reflect. I think that's what old ladies sitting on rockers on their porches staring off into the distance are doing as well. Reflecting.

Not that I'm old, far from it. I'll be the first to tell you if I ever have to go to the hospital again (which is coming up), I'm going to have my laptop strapped to me under the hospital gown.
And there's so much living I want to do.

I'm not ready to give up the ship yet and resurrecting this blog and rekindling old friendships, making new friendships, that's why I'm here. If you want to leave a comment and friend me, please do it and I will reciprocate as I love meeting new people - boomers and otherwise!

Okay gotta get some work done but it's so good to be back home.

New addition to the flock

Is he adorable or what? Full bred Maltese - 3 years old - named Cody (but I call him Cooter)...

We've Moved - Sorta Kinda

I'm letting everyone know I have new digs...you can find me at Island Chick Travels now! I'll still be popping in now and then but if you're into travel like I am, be sure to check me out at my new home. Please update your link section or sign up for my email update alerts at the new blog.

Until next time,

Boomer Chick

this is my rant about snow and stupid people who don't care

Before I go off the deep end, watch this....



This was on I-64 going from Williamsburg to Richmond I think, but before I get on with my rant, I want to tell you about I-64. It. Is. Treacherous. Even in perfect driving conditions. People living over there might be used to it and I remember living in Newport News years and years ago, I did get somewhat used to it, but now? Fuggetaboutit. These people are maniacs. To hear my daughter talk about it, in order to keep up with the maniacs, you have to be one. So, driving 85 on a 55 mph highway is the norm.

However, on this day, people were going slower than normal. It was a blizzard out there. A freak blizzard that no one really knew was going to happen on top of the other snowstorms we've had on the east coast in the last two weeks. If I ever ever ever say I would love some snow, kick me, punch me, bury me.

So here's my rant.

My daughter works at a nursing home. But this nursing home is about 45 minutes away and in order to get to this nursing home, you have to travel through town, across the 5 mile causeway, then another 5 miles on 175 by NASA, then another 20 minutes to a half hour before you get to work.

Doesn't sound like all that - people commute all the time - but when you have a blizzard going on, is that safe to expect people to come in from that far?

I understand the need for people to be there. The residents have to be looked after; I understand that. But to tell someone you better get to work or you'll be fired? Not in those words but they're out there. So she calls out one time before and they basically tell her you have to get here. This time, it was the biggest snowfall I have seen in the area since I've been here. She's crying and all that to someone over their heads, then feels like she's lost her job because she didn't go in.

So, yesterday, she has cabin fever anyway and we're hearing snow is coming but all it really looks like is light snow with wind. Well, the wind ended up turning this light snow into an official blizzard. Only, she feels safe enough at the time to leave. About an hour or two after she's gone, the wind starts howling. Visibility on the causeway becomes nill. I'm calling her and she's saying she's going to do a hall pass, then leave, and I tell her no way in hell can she make it. I told her to make some other arrangements - find a hotel or something - because it's not safe.

I call her later and she tells me she's in Temperanceville going 20 mph.

I call her again and she doesn't answer.

Well, what do you think is going through my mind?

She ended up going slow and determined to make it home and she did, but....and this was the reason for the rant...take a look at that video up there. Do you think these people were out joy riding? No, they were on their way to jobs that required them to be there or they'd be fired. What kind of crock of bull is that? I know we all need our jobs but for god's sake, are we going to risk our lives to get there and for what? To be in accidents and god forbid you died and then what?

Just frosts my cookies.

Ellen Degeneres makes debut on American Idol

Did anyone catch the infamous Ellen on American Idol last night? It was a scream! She sat down beside Simon and said, "Well if this isn't something. I'm coming and you're leaving," and Simon broke out in the biggest grin.

But all in all, she did a fantastic job. I do miss Paula, but Ellen is kicking it!

I did see a few hopefuls last night and can't wait to watch it tonight. It was sad to see the little Tennessee girl go home - first time away from home and had her heart set on making it. Lots of tears as lots went home but they let a lot go through to Hollywood who I knew weren't going to make it.

But Hollywood Week was pretty good last night. Here are some highlights:




Can't wait for the show tonight!

It's No Business Like Snow Business

I've not written in a few days. Life is back to normal. I didn't attend the funeral for the strangest reasons but I really wanted to go. No one knows who got any of her possessions or at least BF isn't letting me in on it. C'est la vie. When the time is right, he'll tell me.

It snowed its arse off here a few days ago. There is still snow everywhere. My daughter got stuck in a 3 foot snowbank thinking it was straight road behind the condos where we live. Silly girl.

Of course, we didn't have a shovel. Who needs a shovel in a place that never gets snow? So, I took a garbage can lid and tried to use that as a shovel, used my boot to kick away some of it and also untilized a broom. It was slow going.

She called her father who came over and told her to do the old forwards backward thing and she got out.

The next day, I went out and made a snow heart with the words "I love snow" in the middle. Thought it was cute. Took pictures but of course I need help downloading them so it'll be awhile until I can get them up here.

I also hear it's going to be another snowfall coming this weekend. Now...I do "I love snow" but...you know how it is when you see your grandma for the first time after many many years then after awhile she gets downright annoying? That's how it is.

Secretly, I do love the white stuff. It was beautiful this go around. Powdery. Didn't make good snow for snowmen or snowballs, but it was really neat. Perfect for those 3 foot snowbanks and was higher in other places.

I took a walk on the dock the next day and the water was just breaking up. Looked like a million iceburgs floating in the water. Took pictures.

Well back to work, but I wanted to let everyone know Boomer Chick is doing just fine.

Thinking, pondering and grieving

It's been slow going for me. Tonight's the viewing. She asked to be cremated so this will be the last time the family can pay respects to her before well before they cremate her.

I've always wanted to be cremated for some odd reason. I hate graveyards, so that's probably the reason. I know once my body has perished, it doesn't matter but I want my ashes out there and not stuck in a box six feet under.

You tend to think of a lot of things you wouldn't normally think about at times like this. Like greed. It's funny there's always that one child in the family who despite the fact they were always loving and caring before turns into a monster at the end.

But I have a theory on that. It's always that one child in every family who's the greediest, but it's often that same child who is hurting the most.

One example is my ex's family. My mother-in-law raised a happy family. Some were (to me) shown a little more favoritism but I also have a theory about that, too. I think the ones who are shown more favoritism are the ones the parents feel are the neediest. But really they aren't. It's just the way it looks to the parents for one reason or the other. Or perhaps in a strange way, they want to give to this person in ways they couldn't give to the others.

When my mother-in-law died, it was that one child who claimed everything, despite the fact there was supposedly a will. Well, actually, the will was respected..it was the other things that weren't in the will. Possessions too numerous to mention or maybe in the will it didn't really specify who would get which and was just mentioned "to be distributed amongst the children."

When you leave it open ended like that, it's that child who is going to go for as much as he or she can. And what happens is that the once solid family structure falls apart. My ex has not spoken to his sister since then and it's been years.

I remember this sister telling my ex to go into the house and get what he wanted after their mother died. What they all didn't want, they were going to get rid of. So he goes and it doesn't pan out quite the way he thought. There were a few boxes in the middle of the living room with his name on it. Supposedly, the sister boxed things SHE felt he should get and took the rest. Everything you can imagine, she took.

But there was one box she overlooked. My daughter found it. It contained a jewelry box. The jewelry wasn't expensive at all and since my ex was about to walk out with basically nothing, my daughter grabbed the jewelry box. In this jewelry box was the ring his mother - her grandmother - had promised her after she died, so she basically felt it was meant to be.

The sister finds out about it and is livid and demands her to give the jewelry box back. "I just don't want to start trouble," my daughter says and agrees to give it back and I looked at her and said, "Are you crazy? She walks out with tons of things that are worth thousands and you and your father walk out with nothing and you're going to give it back?"

The sister ended up calling my daughter a thief, something she would never ever have done if not for the emotions surrounding your mother dying I'm sure.

My daughter ended up keeping the jewelry box but that was the last time anyone talked to the sister again.

As it turned out, the sister basically lost it or at least that's my assumption. She ended up having a fling with her mother's doctor (wait, that was just before she died), had a boob job and bought herself a high level condominium in the hubbub of the city. One of her own children wouldn't even speak to her and instead stayed behind with her dad while the other one when to live with her.

In my own situation, when my mother died, there was just my sister and I. I was the closest to my mother as my mother tended to leave us with my grandmother a lot and go live somewhere else (she hated the shore). So, my sister basically didn't see her as much as I did in my younger years - before the divorce which sent her a little beserk. It's hard to explain unless you're her but we lived with our grandmother for years in a little trailer and later my grandmother bought a house and moved it to her land so that we could have more room.

A year before my mother died, she finally woke up to her senses and rented a bungalow beside my grandmother. I was elated. I finally had my mother back.

I moved out of my grandmother's and into her house. Instead of sharing a bedroom with my sister, I now had my own room. I decorated with David Cassidy posters and listened to Partridge Family records. We had kids over (something I really never wanted to do at my grandmother's) and flirted with boys. It was at that point I finally found peace with my mother leaving earlier on and we became closer than ever.

It was at that time I also discovered boys. I dated a few dead beats in the sly but when I met my ex, it was as if I had finally found someone my mother would approve and so I ended my wild chick days and prepared my wedding.

My mother was happy I had found someone who came from a nice family with money. I think she felt I needed the stability and the security. But I also feel she was fighting her own demons - here she came back to be with her children and it might have been too late because the one she knew she could depend on was leaving her. Sort of like pay back time maybe but it wasn't intentional. I would never do that to my own kids and never did.

I got married hippie style (back then that was the thing to do) and moved in with my new husband. We lived in a small trailer in the middle of the woods and communed with nature.

I stayed in contact with my mother constantly. I loved my new married status but I wanted to let my mother know I wasn't leaving her in spirit. She and her new husband opened a cab business in town and I would work there in the mornings. The pay was shitty but I wanted to keep the family business thriving (for who I don't know as it wasn't certainly for me).

One morning, I was too sick to go in and I tried calling the house and there was no answer. I got in the car to go over and tell her I wasn't coming in and that's when I found her dead.

It's a long story. Supposedly at least this is my belief, the lights in town went out just before she died. There was lots of water in the bathroom floor so I'm thinking she freaked while taking a bath and maybe lost it who knows but she was found kneeling with her hands outstretched in the middle of her bedroom floor completely naked. Dead.

I walked into the house and her dog was in the living room which was odd. Usually he's right there in bed with her. I walked down the hall and her door was open and that's what I saw. I screamed and ran next door to my grandmother's house.

I watched her being rolled away on a stretcher with a blanket over her body. And that was the last I saw of my mother.

It's been a long time since then. I was only 19, so it's been a long long time but some things you just never forget no matter how much time goes by.

After she died, I felt really abandoned. It was my one chance to have my mother back, and she left me again. And it was permanent this time.

But anyway, I became the greedy child. I wanted everything she had because...it was my way of keeping my mother with me. She didn't have much so it wasn't things that were expensive, just things that were sentimental. And I wanted it all.

So you see...maybe the greedy child isn't a bad person, she just might be the one who was grieving the most. I could be wrong as there's lots of people out there with different personalities but it's something to think about, isn't it.

Sad Day

Today's a sad day for me. BF's mother died last night.

BF is a used-to-be-boyfriend but now we're just friends, but I was really close to her. She's given me her Maltese, Cody, so I'm sure you all will be hearing more about him.

BF's mother, Jill, had brain cancer only they just now found it. And that's what I don't understand. After all the hospitals she had been in and out of for other things, you mean no one picked up on it?

So it's a really sad day. I nursed BF through his father's passing, now I'm having to do the same with his mother's passing.

But what upsets me is Hospice. I wasn't there so I don't know exactly how much pain she was in these last few days but it wasn't but a few weeks ago when she didn't know she had it, she was the fine, or at least she didn't appear to be dying anyway. She wasn't complaining of headaches or anything but she was complaining about losing control of her hand (think that was the first sign or one of many undetected). And they all passed it off as maybe a stroke she had but didn't know she had. Maybe a stroke? Don't you think people know if they have strokes or not? Or do they?

Anyway, Hospice. After she got out of the hospital in Richmond about a week ago where they did a test to see how big the tumor in her brain was (very large and fatal as it turned out), she was sent home to live out the rest of her days. Doctors said she had maybe 4 weeks left.

BF said she was in a lot of pain so Hospice gave her morphine about 8 in the morning day before yesterday, but also doubled up on it. So she's been lying in bed since 8 in the morning 2 days ago. BF took a break to come over here while his two sisters watched over her. She never woke up.

At one point, she made strange breathing noises and the two sisters held hands and said, "Mom, if you want to go to Dad, you can go." Right after they said that, she took a deep breath (still not awake though) and died. Her mouth and eyes opened and that was the last they saw of their mother.

Even though she appeared to be asleep, she heard.

But this Hospice thing...my daughter is a nurse and she says when Hospice is called, it's near the end and they hurry things along sometimes and so giving a woman a double dose of Morphine...isn't that playing God?

Larry Pratt's a star on American Idol

Who watched American Idol last week?

American Idol is my most favoritest show of all time. Call me shallow but it is!

I watched the first show of the season last Tuesday and again Wednesday night and by far, Atlanta had the most talented. But it was the very very last contestant that floored everyone. It wasn't so much his singing voice, but well...you be the judge...

Sick doggie, squawking ducks and a moment taken from me

I've got another sick doggie on my hands. Skylar. She's a full-blooded Sheltie, maybe about five years old and fatter than a butterball. Two days ago, she threw up. And threw up. And threw up. There was a huge surprise for me in the kitchen which contained bits of cheese my daughter had given her earlier. I cleaned it up, then went in the living room and there were more surprises for me. Just spots but quite a few of them. We just figured she had some kind of tummy thing going on - that dog will eat anything left on the floor if you aren't careful, but that night, she wouldn't touch her dog food. Now, this dog eats. She eats hers and she eats the others if you're not careful.

We knew something was wrong so we kept a vigil on her. After what we went through with Max, my heart was sinking. I can't go through another sick dog.

The day after that, yesterday, she still wouldn't eat. Nothing. She was drinking however so that was good.

Both my daughter and I had to work last night so it was frantic city the whole time. She was texting me, "When are you getting out of there." And I was texting her hour by hour the status of my departure.

I finally got home and I wasn't sure what I'd find. I pulled up into the carport and there was no barking. Now Max and Cassie, Cassie especially, can't hear a darn thing - at least not something outside but Skylar can hear a pin drop. Usually when I pull up, there's barking. Skylar had alerted everyone, "Mommy's home! Mommy's home!"

So anyway, no barking. I get in and Max and Cassie are by the door so they obviously heard me which was quite a surprise. Usually Skylar is right there with them, too, but she was upstairs looking down at me with those pitiful eyes. I was just relieved she was still alive.

I texted my daughter she was fine to help relieve her worries and I tried to get her to eat but she would have nothing of it. When my daughter got home, she took her out, then put her in the bedroom with her.

I got up this morning and there she was in the same spot my daughter had put her. I picked her up and carried her out - no easy feat down 2 flights of stairs with an overweight dog on your hands but I did it.

We got outside and it perked her up a bit. She took a pee but it wasn't as much as she usually does but I knew she was drinking water but not that much.

I took her inside and that was about time my daughter got up. I fed her a piece of chicken and she ate it. I tried feeding her more but I'm not sure if she ate it or Max got it, but I know a bite or two went in her.

I fed Max his usual balogne sandwich breakfast and tried to feed her some but she wasn't buying it.

I opened the sliding glass doors and Skylar got up and walked outside on the deck. So she's almost there, but still not out of the forest yet.

But what I wanted to tell you is this. When I was walking Max (who incidentally is having a ball with his second chance of life), there was a flock of ducks flying overhead. I thought, how neat. They were low flying and just as loud as you can ever imagine.

And I was thinking that is the most beautiful sound on a crisp winter morning. All is quiet but these squawking ducks and I was thinking Max was thinking it was so neat, too.

And I was thinking how truly beautiful this island really is.

I get inside and a little while later hear gunshots. And gunshots. And gunshots.

I had a "moment" out there with Max, the death-defying dog, and these squawking ducks. The hunters have just taken that away.

That really really bothers me.