Sunday, January 10, 2010

Guest Blogger: Relationship Expert Barbora Knobova talks respect

I have a fantastic guest blogger today. Barbora Knobova has been touring with Pump Up Your Book going on three months now (and will return next month!) and I couldn't let her not stop by Boomer Chick to give us some undying relationship guest post love. This woman is dynamite. I will be reviewing her new book, Tales for Delicious Girls, on the 18th at Pump Up Your Book, but for now, welcome Barbora as she gives us her latest relationship advice on give and take. Welcome Barbora!

Relationship Advice: Give And Take
by Barbora Knobova

I have mentioned this in one of my previous posts but I can’t stress it enough. People don’t know how to flirt anymore. It seems to me that the art of subtle looks, graceful gestures and smart, charming comments and compliments has disappeared together with the generation of our fathers, if not grandfathers. What used to be funny, adorable and delightful is now crude, lame and awkward.

In an old French movie, the main character, a woman, explains what courtship means: “It is a series of man’s gallantries through which the man gains woman’s attention and favor.” It is very sweet, very true and very missing in today’s world.

However, it is not just the art of flirting that has been going south, but also the world of dating and relationships as such. Our lives are fast and hectic. We want everything now and we want it to be perfect. If our relationship isn’t spotless 24/7, we feel disillusioned and prefer to move on as fast as possible. How easy and how convenient.

I think one of the reasons is that we have become too judgmental and disrespectful of the opposite sex. We are a take-everything-give-nothing generation. We have a list of requirements that we expect to be met but we bring very little, if anything, to the table. We want, we need, we desire. We don’t give, we don’t offer, we don’t care. Most of us seem to have forgotten that first you have to give, only then you can take. You can’t receive unless you have given. If you offer a lot, you will receive a lot. If you offer very little and expect to receive the world, you will end up with nothing but disappointment.

Therefore, love yourself, respect yourself and treat yourself the way you want others to treat you. Expect only what you yourself can give. Do not settle for less but don’t expect a prince charming to come and save you from your misery if you’re not able to save yourself. Love yourself and you will be loved. And don’t forget to be a lady if you want to attract a gentleman.

Barbora Knobova is a writer, love coach and expert in Delicious Life. A world traveler, she is one of those rare world citizens who live everywhere and nowhere. Barbora is a firm believer in female friendship, loyalty and bonding. She writes hilarious, sharp-witted, caustically apt, ironic, moving, true books for strong, independent, smart, fearless women. Barbora has also written several self-improvement books and teaches women about the importance of self-love in relationships and life in general. Barbora speaks eight languages and has found her home away from home in New York, London and Milan. She is always on the move, accompanied by her beagle Brinkley, the nasty dog from her new book Tales for Delicious Girls.

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